Wednesday, August 31, 2016

September Newsletter

               Here we are at the start of another school year and we are very much looking forward to getting started!

Dan and Archie on a walk in the desert 
it was 120 that day.
 Last month I finished up my dance classes at Open Arms (the free local daycare).  It was fun but I was also glad for it to be over.   At times it can be difficult when kids are made to come to class who don’t want to be there.  That was the case at Open Arms. I did manage to forge good relations with a few girls. They were delightful which made for a slightly easier class then it could have been.  Dan continued guitar classes in our home while the skill center was closed.  Dan also has been discipling two men.  It is not his area of expertise but as God calls so He equips and we so appreciate your prayers.  It has been going really well and Dan has been enjoying his time with the guys.  We went to Kaitlyn’s wedding (our good friend from intern bible study) which was beautiful.  Kaitlyn and her husband both love the Lord which made the wedding even more beautiful.  If you think about it pray for them he deploys to the Middle East in 2 weeks for 7 months.  We also had a nice little break at that time and came back refreshed.  Dan got to use his evangelism and C.N.A skills while on the trip.  He got into a few conversations about the Gospel. As always it was a joy for me to watch.  I also got to see and disciple a few gals on the way there which I love to do.

We stayed in a little studio apartment behind a women’s home while on vacation (airbnb).  Her husband has dementia and Parkinson’s. One night she came knocking on our door frantically.  Her husband had fallen out of his wheel chair and she could not help him back in.  I told her “you have come to the right place!”  Dan went in and after about 10 minutes I wondered what had happened to him.  That lasted all about 5 seconds until I remember I am married to an evangelist lol.  Her pictures on the AirBnB web site were not very good so I also photographed the place for her.  She was really happy to get the pictures I sent.  God is good and gave us many opportunities on our trip.  It was also a great time to come together as a family and just be without work or ministry.  We got some clarity, stepped out, and took a good look at our upcoming year, which was very encouraging.

Archie's first day of school. That 
suburban in the background is the bus. 
We have to meet the bus in the center 
of town about a mile from home.
Archie started pre-school at the on Monday at the Sunflower House.  For those that might not remember the school is a free Christian school that teaches English to the children.  They are glad to have Archie back again, as well as my help.  He goes three days a week and I go with him on Friday’s to help teach.  In addition to helping at the school physically; we are also helping out by purchasing cleaning supplies, paper towels (for kids to dry their hands on after washing) and thieves oil hand soap for the school.  I will also be teaching dance to the pre-school kids in the morning as well as the older kids (Ages 5 to 8) that come in the afternoon after school for the afternoon program on Friday’s.

               Archie’s school is held at the local skill center, “Casa De Maria”, it is also run by a Christian missionary.  This is where Dan will be holding his guitar classes once again.  We held them at our home over the summer but are glad to have them back at the school because of its central location for all the students.  Dan was given a key this year so thing should go much smoother as he proceeds. He has 4 regular students and a few new ones waiting to get started.  I have been listening to the kids learn over the summer and it has been really fun to hear their progress.  In addition to guitar classes at Casa De Maria, Dan will also continue to teach guitar at Casa De Luz (Primo Tapia Free day care) and randomly to those that ask from around the area.

               Dance classes start up full time next week.  I teach twice at Casa De Luz on Tuesday. I have four classes plus solos for the Nutcracker at the church here in La Mision, which was my regular schedule last year.  This fall into winter I have added two classes at the pre-school and one class at Door of Faith orphanage. That rounds it out to about 10 hours of dance a week which is just perfect for me.  That is about half of the amount I use to teach. With everything else we have going on its more than enough time. I plan on producing a very simple Nutcracker show this year with all the dancers.  I am really excited about this.  Most people here in our little town have no idea what a Ballet is and I am super excited to bring culture to our community this way. 
Dan's guitar class at our home this summer.

Dan has also picked up another “client”.  Working again with Siloe Clinic they have asked him to help out another man in a wheel chair.  We don’t’ know much about him and Dan goes to help him on Thursday for his first time.  Carlos is doing well and really happy to have the new powered wheel chair.  Check out Facebook for pictures of that.  We also scheduled in Friday, day time, for Dan to spend time out and about playing music in the surrounding cities.  Using music as a tool to reach people for the gospel has always been a part of what we do, but we felt as it is Dan’s first love he should get back to more of it.  He is really looking forward to getting out there and spending more time talking one on one with the lost.  Friday’s mid-September will also start Intern Bible Study again.  We have missed this time and can’t wait to get started again.

This is a picture of  the apartmentbuilding where we live. 
The bottom right hand side behind the garbage can
and bushes is our apartment.
Prayers:  I have to stop taking the allergy medication Zyrtec.  I have tried once and not been able to.  I really need to because of the side effects I am having but the withdrawal symptoms are so incredibly bad that it is going to be very difficult.  I seem to be having a semi rare reaction to coming off of it. I appreciate prayers as I come off of this medication.  Please pray that God will work in the hearts of those that need to be a part of our Bible Study group.  It is such a good program for the interns and we know if they come they will be blessed and grow.  We invited two girls from Dan’s guitar class.  They are American’s and possibly unsaved so prayers for them and them being a part of this class is greatly appreciated. Please pray for our health as we go back to school.  Arch and I pick up anything and everything in the way of colds and it can be very hard on all of us.  Please pray for Dan as he steps out again onto the streets for safety, as he works on Bible Study classes for wisdom, and as he teaches and cares for the Carlos and this new gentleman for strength and peace of mind.  Please pray for me in figuring out how to costume all the dancers for the Nutcracker.  I thought I did the Nutcracker on a shoestring budget before!  No one here has any money for costumes so it is up to me to figure out how to costume everyone and purchase as little as possible.

Thanks to all who read and support and pray and give.  We are so blessed to be here!

The Martins

"I have no use for cranks who despise music, because it is a gift of God.  Music drives away the Devil and makes people gay; they forget thereby all wrath , unchastity, arrogance, and the like.  Next after theology, I give to music the highest place and the greatest honor" - Martin Luther

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Wednesday, August 24, 2016

A Happy Marriage

By: Rachel Martin

OK so let say you have read the last two blogs and are up to date on the issues young men and women face.  Let us say you have overcome all of those hurdles and now are ready for marriage.  My first statement is “don’t wait”.  Marry the wife of your youth and cling to her now (Gen 24:2) Waiting only tempts fate and I don’t’ know where in the heck we got the idea that we should wait until we are a certain age or that we need 2 years to plan a wedding.  Men ask, ladies set a date, and make it quick.  It is unkind to ask young people to wait.  They have already loudly and clearly said “we are ready to get married and take the next step”.  Let us not pretend that waiting is not a big deal and they can manage just fine.  It is a silly and ridiculous thing.

Now on to the marriage part.  I will say upfront that I may not be the world’s best expert on marriage.   I am once (biblicaly) divorced and newly married for only 5 years.  However I have learned a thing or two and I know enough scripture that I can tell you marriage does not have to be as hard as everyone makes out like it is. I have spent time looking at happy marriages, well, and unhappy ones too, and figuring out what makes them tick.  I have found that for me and my husband if we adhere to a few things laid out in scripture then we do pretty good.  It is when one of us gets our hearts set in the wrong direction that things get rough.

               As I write out below what I believe makes for a good marriage don’t think I am turning a blind eye to how tough it can be.  Or that, like one person said to me recently, “you guys are just different”.  My husband and I are no different than any one else on this planet.  We don’t have extra doses of patience or are somehow more Godly then everyone else.  We had an argument over how to teach our son his ABCs yesterday.  But when I thought about everything I will talk about below it seemed stupid and petty.  I know marriage can be hard, but with a few things to remember, 90% of the time it can be, lovely, fun and a great place to grow.  I just don’t’ want those in hard marriages to think I am being trite.  It is never too late and it is always worth the work.

                First and foremost; I think good communication is central to a healthy marriage.  I know many couples that don’t communicate well with each other and they have a hard time.  I feel horrible for them because the answer is so simple.  Talk!  You are supposed to rejoice in your wife (provb 5:18). You are supposed to cleave to the wife of your youth (Mat 19:5).  I looked up the word Cleave in the dictionary.  Cleave: to stick closely to, to adhere to, cling to.  If I am cleaving to something I know it pretty intimately.  Also if I am rejoicing in something I really like it and want to know more about it.  The only way that happens is through conversation.  I get it maybe you are married to a “guy guy,” or to someone that is emotionally detached for whatever reason.  That is your obstacle to overcome with love and respect.  No one said a good marriage was not going to take some work.  Deal with it and get talking. If it takes a counselor or therapist then so be it.  God gave people the gift of counseling for a reason.  When someone tells me they won’t take my dance class because they don’t know how to dance I tell them “that is exactly why you take dance, to learn”.  The same principle applies here.  God gave us gifted people to counsel and help us along and teach us how to work well in our marriages.  It’s not a  shameful thing it is a lovely helpful thing that I think everyone should embrace even and I dare say especially when your marriage is good.  

Every couple should work through creating open communication, whatever that looks like to you.  If you are a guy and reading this and think that I mean spilling every internal thought to your wife; mostly I do. I think there should be no secrets between spouses.  However what I mostly mean is being on the same page with each other.  In conversations like: “This is our general plan for the kids” or, “this is what I think should happen with our money”, or “this is what I want our marriage to look like.”  Those conversations are very important. Soul bearing can wait until are in a comfortable place with your spouse, and can be honest without fear of rejection.  When your spouse does bear their soul you have to be ready to not judge and to be a helpmate (I am talking to both men and women here) and encourage or else open communication will always falter and eventually go away.

               Now, if you have moved on to conversing, being on the same page, and working together in partnership: then comes the hard part. The part that is not popular because it is so difficult.   Men lead women follow.  In marriage men are designed to have headship and women are designed to be helpers.  I find that the meaning "leader" has been hijacked by some folks to make it sound like a man gets to rule over a women without her having any say and prefer the translation "headship".  It is up to the man to set the tone, basic spiritual function and direction of a family.  Honest to goodness women you DO NOT want that job.  When you relinquish control of “taking charge" and your husband and let him lead it is liberating.  It is SO much more fun to be the helper in this situation.  Trust me I am a leader though and through and my husband is a follower.  Still when we step into the roles God designed for us which is opposite of our natural instincts everything flows and works so much better.

           My grandma told me she came home one day and told grandpa that she was done doing the bookkeeping.  She said it was hard but he took over and it worked to their advantage.  (Just as a side note: I don’t think that you have to stop doing the books for your family, I do ours because I am better at and my husband wants me to it this is just an example).  My point is she stopped doing what she felt was a leading position and my grandpa stepped up.  Just like in my blogs last week to young ladies.  If we set the bar low we get what we expect.  Trust your husband, allow him his space in headship and step back to watch him flourish.  When your husband feels that you trust him he will love you all the more.

In part of allowing your husband to be the headship.  It means I find that it is super important to respect your husband (Eph 5:33).  Scripture tells us it is better for a man to die in the desert then to live with a contentious wife.  Proverbs 21:9 says "It is better for a man to live in the corner of a roof then to live in a house with a contentious women".    For a long time I thought that that meat mean spirited hateful women always nagging. I disregarded this verse for years thinking I am not a hateful person so it did not apply to me.   However I have found that when I start pushing my husbands whole demeanor changes, and not for the better.  You will never get your husband to change by nagging him. 

There is a reason why the Bible tells wives to respect their husbands.  When I properly respect what my hubby is doing he asks me for advice.  It is a give and take relationship.  If I have my head set in a direction opposite of his (which happens) and I annoy him with it all the time he tunes me out.  Men need respect!  Figure out what that looks like to your husband and do it.  For my guy it is encouragement and affirmation.  I find when I am walking in a way that encourages him, everything in our lives is just so much better.  Those of you that know us may be thinking “yeah because it’s easy for you, you are married to Bible Man.  Sure I am but it’s not always easy Bible man does not equal perfect.  I have just as hard a time with this as anyone else.  However he loves me like he should and it makes it so much easier.  

               Men are supposed to love their wives (Eph 5:33).  This one is much easier for me to understand because my husband does it so well.  It will look different for everyone because we are all different.  (Try the 5 love languages test online if your not sure.) Again; men, figure out what love looks like to your wife and do it.  It’s not that hard. She will probably tell you if you ask.  For me, my husband is always leading us spiritually, telling me how amazing and beautiful I am, and doing things for me that show he pays attention and cares.  This shouldn’t be that hard guys, let me shorten that for you.  He basically tells me I am pretty, does the dishes once in awhile and does weekly devotions.  It makes me feel loved and cared about.  He knows my love language is acts of service and he does stuff.  Most girls don’t require much.   An “I love you, you are really pretty” goes a long, long way.  In this age of modern technology this should not be that hard.  If you really can’t figure this out go to Google and type in “how to romance my wife” or "how to lead a Christian family".  How easy is that!

               There is more depth and details as I have so much to say on the subject.  I feel like I should wrap this up though.  The basic idea is that I constantly see women warring against their men and trying to change them. In life, the only person you have the power to change is yourself.  Pray for your husband. (The book: “power of a praying wife” is a great resource). Respect what you feel are “stupid decisions” and move on.  On the other hand sometimes men think that once they have a woman they don’t have to date her anymore.  They don’t’ have to let her know how they feel.  That is as silly as it is self-defeating.  A woman that feels loved would go to the ends of the earth for her husband literally, I moved to Mexico for mine.  I am not talking about fake respect and love either.  If you can’t figure this one out you might need to work on your relationship with God.  As my mother would say “go to your room and pray about it”.  I thought that was stupid when I was young (and honestly didn't always do it sorry mom), but it is a principle that has stuck with me. 

God gave us the Scripture’s for our benefit. It’s more than a bunch of rules that we have to try to adhere to. It’s like God is saying in scripture, “This is how I designed marriage, for your enjoyment and for my glory.”  When my husband loves me properly, and I am respecting him, and we are talking and on the same page things just get so much better. People have said the Bible is antiquated and has nothing to say to us in this generation.  If you are afraid that these commands in scripture are just a way for men to be demeaning towards women; don’t be, that is far from the intent. It is a recipe for a happy marriage where love and respect co-mingle and harmony abounds.  

Wednesday, August 17, 2016

Young Women

By: Rachel Martin

Last week I tackled something very close to my heart.  I talked about young men and the issue of warring for Christ.  If you have not read that blog go check it out because it has direct impact on what I am going to say here.  It is your turn ladies.  Once again I would love to point my finger at culture and what I have to say has to do with that for sure.  However if we are not combating the world with the Church then what are we doing? 

               The base issue here is that we live in a fallen world but I think the particular issue I want to tackle starts with the Women’s Lib movement in the 70s.  What our mothers did was brave and beautiful and I for one am very glad of it in many ways.  They stood up and said, if I have to work I want equal pay, I want rights the same as everyone else, I want to be treated equally and have safety and good standards in my workplace.  On the one hand what they did was amazing and brave on the other many pushed it too far.  It got intertwined with the free sex and drug and anti-establishment movement and things got convoluted.  What they ended up saying was I don’t’ need a man, I don’t’ want a man and I can do this on my own.  And so started the falling apart of the family unit.

Through the next few years things got even more convoluted.  What we have created is women that pursue men because we have told men that they cannot pursue anymore.  The church has unfortunately backed this up.  Families are so wrapped up in fear that they are encouraging young women to push back.  They started to see what the hippies did and swung back hard the other direction. We teach that sex is wrong, and not that it has its place in marriage. It creates fear rather than holiness.   Then, when they get to the point that they can’t stand it anymore, they pursue on their own and men get scared.   God lets us know in the scriptures the way He set things up for our delight and benefit.  Women pursuing men never works out in scripture yet here we are as a whole encouraging it.  In fact the scriptures that come to mind about women pursuing are about harlots. It is a vicious cycle and no one wins in the end. 

I know I just painted a pretty bleak picture but there are a few things we can do to combat these issues.  I always say “start with prayer”.  Without prayer for the young men in our generation nothing is going to change.  Young men need to step up and start doing their job of pursuit even though it is hard. The second is young women setting the bar higher the third is the input we are giving young women.  

               To young women, read Proverbs 31 about what a wife is.  Then figure out what her husband must be like and shoot for that.  She is a business running, mission minded; loved by all, house running, flourishing women.  What must her husband be like to help encourage a woman like that?  Shoot for someone that can live up to what God has created a marriage to be.  Look around at women you see that encompass the Proverbs 31 model of wife. After that, look at her husband.  Is she doing marriage on her own or is she being encouraged by her husband?  Make friends with that lady and hear her stories.  Settle for no one other than Bible Man.  In other words settle for no one other than the man who is sold out 100% for Christ. 

This does not work for everyone but when I was dating (in my 30s slightly too old for a fathers permission) I made men wanting to date me go visit my pastor first.  It weeded out a lot of duds and I ended up with Bible Man.  I set the bar for a high jumper and would not accept any other.  OK, sure, it was embarrassing and more than one man turned me down flat and one even got angry.  Can you imagine what it would have been like had I decided to date those guys because they were cute and sweet?  What would happen, when I was deeply involved and realized their heart wasn’t committed to God’s heart?  It happened.  I set that up the speaking to my pastor thing after a real heartbreaking dating experience.  It was horrible! I decided to set the bar up a few notches and it worked out quite well!  The sad part is I know several young women doing this and they stay single.  I covered why in my last blog.

I am not saying that you should sit on your hands and do nothing.  You should speak to young men, you should online date (although be careful I did that and dated two real creeps), you can let him know you’re interested.  No matter who you are there is someone out there for you and to him you are the most beautiful creature in the world.  When I talk about guys pursuing a women I mean setting the tone and pace of a relationship just like he would in marriage.  There is nothing wrong with going up to a young man and saying “hi I’m, so and so , I like your shoes”, Or whatever.  The problem comes when you don’t let him take the reigns from there.  There is nothing wrong with letting a man know you are interested.

               Now where did I get all this great info?  Part I suppose is the hard knocks of life but mostly I got it from Godly women willing to put in the time to disciple me.  It all starts with Godly women that will tell you the hard stuff.  You need a woman or women that will encourage you and not tickle your ears.   You are going to need someone smart that can look past a guy’s cute exterior and see to the heart of the matter both good and bad.  A girlfriend is someone that walks with you, enjoying the ride and gushing with you over your first kiss.  The discipler is someone who questions whether you should be kissing this one in the first place.  Do you see the difference here?

One of the reasons I kept dating my husband was because a couple of wise women told me that I should.  I thought he was too young and maybe did not have the potential to lead me.  I got wise council and it was pointed out to me just how capable he was of leading.  Wise council is not only to tell you to call it off it is also to let you know when to keep going.  A gauge of how you should actively take part in a relationship while still allowing him to set the tone and lead.  The heart is a funny thing. A safe place, with a Godly older wiser women to talk to, can make the difference between a lifetime in a horrible marriage and a lifetime in a good one.

Now the next part is not wise for everybody but it was for me and my husband.  I encourage you, should you do all these things and find a great guy, don’t’ wait.  When you find a man that fits all the qualifications (looks and humor are a plus) marry him!  It says in Genesis that it is not good for man to be alone.  Read Genesis 2 for reference here.  There are so many reasons why it is not good for a man to be alone.  To start with there is a tree he is not supposed to eat from.  He needs help with that (just kidding).  Yeah it was not great help but at least they had each other going forward after the fall.  I digress though.  Is there such thing as a soul mate?  My favorite pastor says “you know how I know my wife is my soul mate, I married her”.  Life is hard and no one is perfect.  When you find a Godly man; marry him and do life together.  It will be hard and good; some days it will be both. If he is perusing you, don’t put marriage off for when it is more convenient. He is better off with you anyway.  

I think the biggest thing I want young ladies to get from this blog is that you are not alone.  This is something every single women faces.  It is not that you are not thin enough or pretty enough or tall enough or smart enough.  The problem starts with the fact that young men are not warring for the right thing.  I want to see some light shed on the issues young women face and what we can do about it.  I can’t be the only one in the world that looks around and sees all the amazing, single, young ladies and can’t figure out why they aren’t already married.   

 Older women should disciple the younger and be wise themselves.  Please don’t turn a blind eye and toss your lot in with the world who says things are just fine.  Realize this is a fallen world and walk with young ladies to help them though this very difficult thing they face.  Pray for their future husbands, pray for wisdom, pray for their relationships and for wisdom to help guide them.  If you are an older women reading my blog, and you don’t have a younger one you are already teaching; then find one!  Get in the trenches and do it.  I am not talking about your kids either.  That doesn’t count. I have a child and I tell him something, he ignores it, then someone else tells him and they are an instant genius.  Discipleship isn’t quite the same as a parental relationship.  I am sure older ladies if you think about it there are a few young ladies that you have spent some time rolling your eyes about.  Now is the time to reach out and help them instead of just passing judgment.

Wednesday, August 10, 2016

Young Men and Missing Disciples

By: Rachel Martin 

               I have talked about our town in Mexico before, but let me quickly revisit this lovely place for the sake of this blog.  I live in a small town in Baja Mexico called La Mision.   There are a few ministries here run by American missionaries.  Especially during the summer they are swamped with folks coming here on short term missions trips.  At each of these ministries there are many, beautiful, saved, young ladies with a heart for service and following Christ.  Every year as short term missions craziness ends I am always struck by the fact that these amazing gals don’t have a dozen young men that has asked them for their numbers.

               I quizzed a couple of the girls about it and they said two things that confirm one of my soap box issues I am constantly ranting about.  They said, one, that the young men that come never approach them with an idea towards dating and that, two, hardly any young men come on missions trips anyways.  It was then my job to let them know that it is in fact not them that is the problem.  When I was done they said they were encouraged so I assume it is safe to share here in my blog. 

               I would love to point my finger at the current culture but I am afraid the blame does not completely fall on their shoulders.  I think that if the church stepped up to the plate it could completely change the course of this downward spiral that our current generation is on.  I see it carried out in some churches and I love it.  However they are few and far between.

               Men at their core (in general) are fighters, say what you will but my son wants to hit stuff and wrestle and get his way and lead us in whatever we are doing.  Men in general war, there is a reason for that.  God designed men to toil in the earth.  In Genesis 3:17 it says; Then to Adam He said, “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree about which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat from it’; Cursed is the ground because of you; In toil you will eat of it all the days of your life.  It is not ideal and because of sin but it is the way man was created.  God designed them to work hard and accomplish.

 At church young men get the message that they need to sit still, sing songs about love, shake hands, come to men’s retreats and bare their souls, let someone else older lead, let a women lead, and that they don’t have to step up.  The church needs to be giving young men something to fight for.   We need to be giving young men the tools to properly pursue a woman.  A message of; you should do this and it is worth fighting for is what is needed in this stagnant video game playing generation.  My husband play’s video games so don’t think I am down on them. I think they have their place.  However I am sure you, like I, can’t help but see correlation here?  They are replacing the titillation of porn and the pursuit of war video games in place of perusing a Godly women and fighting for the name of Christ.

               Why are we not teaching them that God and the gospel is something to fight for?  Why not give them something scary and exciting like a mission trip, or street evangelism, or bringing food to the homeless.  Turn over the reigns to young men before you are so old you can’t do it anymore.  Use that time to encourage and bring up young men instead of holding on and withering away while the young men are left floundering.  Have them pray for the offering, have them teach Sunday school.  Give them a young man to disciple, themselves (like 12 years old) and teach them how to do it.  Give them people to fight for and the name of Christ to win their battle for.

Where are the young men that will go into the jungles to bring the gospel?  Where is the retired military man ready to train young men to go free young women from sex slavery? (every young man in the church would jump at the chance to do that, my husbands eyes light up when I suggested it)  Where are the young men that will come to a foreign country with bravery in their heart and stand up for the rights of the Christian’s being persecuted?  We send our young men off to war all the time.  Where are the churches worriers?  I went to Bible Gateway (my favorite web site for finding scripture) and looked up the phrase “young men”.  Turns out in scripture they were pretty much always sending the young men out to do stuff.  Then I typed in old men.  Guess what?  They are sending, teaching, or grumbling.  Why have we reduced this generation to boys who can shave instead of men who will fight for what is right.  Ladies do what you can but it looks to me according to scripture this is a young men old men issue. 

               I love the heart for the young women that serve here.  They should not have to be doing it alone.  Of the missionary interns in this community there is one single American man.  That is it!  And God bless him, a young man that is willing to fight for Christ and His people.  In over 10 young adults living and serving Christ in this community as intern missionaries (roughly) 10 girls to 1 man is not good!  Even worse there is only one girl being sought for dating for marriage!  I can’t help but be here and see the lack of young men warring for Christ and weep.  Literally I weep as I write this.  It is heart breaking that as the world starts sending women into combat and we as Christians shake our heads we don’t realize we have been doing it for years!  We send our single young ladies into the mission field and doom them to a life of singleness because the young men won’t go.

               I am not advocating physical war in the name of Christ.  People have done that and it does not go well.  What I am advocating is giving our young men the tools and training they need to step out and be a part of Gods Kingdom.  For young men to step up and ask the Godly women to coffee.  For young men to stop sitting in the pews and pretending.  For young men to get out and put themselves in tough spaces for Christ.  They are searching.  They want more.  It is human and man in generals nature to want more then video games and to sit in the stands.  Older men step out.  Ask young men who they are courting, what country they plan to spend their gap year before college serving in.  Ask them what they are doing for the kingdom.  Ask them and then listen and guide.  Older women this is in part our problem and I will tackle that in next week’s blog but this is on us too.  We have a space to help and make this work.

               There is scripture in Isaiah 4:1 that talks about 7 women grabbing hold of one man saying marry me marry me. They are talking about the physical loss of the Jewish men but the idea still applies. This is an imminent problem and if we do nothing this is what is coming for our young ladies.  It is already upon us in some respects.  When gorgeous, godly women working for Christ can’t get a date.  There is a serious crack in the dam and something needs to be done.  I could go on and on about this but I hope that at least I have drawn some attention to this issue.  I think it the biggest problem facing our culture today.  If young men are not trained up in they way they should go (Proverbs 22:6).  Things will never change.